


what the fuck?

by innersanctuaries



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-28
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:47:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22929715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/innersanctuaries/pseuds/innersanctuaries
Summary: It was a hot summer day, one that found Richie and Bill swimming in the quarry. The cold water chilled them to the bone, but they stayed in as long as they could before getting out. The sun dried them off almost the moment they stepped foot out of the water, leaving them throwing their clothes back on and walking back to their bikes.
Relationships: Bill Denbrough/Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 4
Kudos: 139





	what the fuck?

**Author's Note:**

> This is not in the price: two hearts and a leg universe! It's a completely different thing and was born entirely because I saw a fucking hilarious post [(this one)](https://www.instagram.com/p/B9A4Ln4FdMA/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link) and just had to write it. Credit to [@scribbleworms on IG](https://www.instagram.com/scribbleworms/) for the funny as hell edit.

It was a hot summer day, one that found Richie and Bill swimming in the quarry. The cold water chilled them to the bone, but they stayed in as long as they could before getting out. The sun dried them off almost the moment they stepped foot out of the water, leaving them throwing their clothes back on and walking back to their bikes. 

“H-hey, Richie?”

“Yeah?” Wiping the droplets of water off of his glasses, Richie fiddled with his bracelet. Gross, it was still soggy. 

“W-why do you always k-k-keep your soulmark covered?”

“Um,” Freezing in place, Richie took a moment to choose his next words carefully. It was surprising that it had taken Bill this long to ask him, as they’d known each other for a few weeks already. Being the new kid had its perks, but the big downside was the sheer amount of people that wanted to know what his soulmate’s first words would be. “That’s a little personal.”

“Oh…” Trailing off, Bill looked away nervously. “S-sorry, Richie.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

In truth, Richie would love to rip off the soggy bracelet and let his skin breathe. He was sure that he’d be getting a rash later, or very irritated skin at the least. He would love to show his best friend his soulmark, the only problem was that it was dumb as all fuck. 

Over the years, Richie had spent his life hopping from place to place, it came with having parents that were never quite happy with their surroundings. He’d never minded it, mainly because he’d always been bullied for the one thing people usually didn’t get bullied for: his soulmark. In truth, even he could agree that it was pretty fucking stupid, but so were other people’s. Unfortunately, he’d never quite found someone whose soulmark out-dumbassed his own. 

“Have I shown y-you mine?” Bill asked, already offering up his forearm. In neat writing, it said  _ ‘See that? That’s a Cedar Waxwing.’  _

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It’s a type of b-b-bird. I looked it up,” He said proudly. “It’s a r-really pretty bird, too.”

“What’s it look like?” Richie messed with his bracelet, trying to get it to dry faster. 

“Well-”

“ _ MOVE!” _

Both Richie and Bill jumped at least a foot, looking around them to find the source of the scream. Propping his bike back up against a tree, Richie peeked out into the street, only to find a bike coming at him full speed ahead. 

“What was that?” Bill wondered. His question wasn’t left unanswered for very long.

“ _ MOVE!”  _ The kid riding the bike screamed at Richie, giving him almost no time to throw himself back and keep himself from getting run over. “ _ I’M ABOUT TO SHIT MYSELF!” _

“What the-” Richie barely survived, feeling the tire bite into the ground right in front of his toes as the bike zoomed past him and Bill. His wrist tingled, and he had a moment of revelation. That was him. That was his soulmate, zooming off into the distance. “What the fuck?”

“I wonder w-what Eddie ate this time,” Bill mused, staring at the bike disappearing over a hill. 

Richie was shaken, so much so that he took a moment to sit down on the nearest rock and think about what had just happened. Fiddling with his bracelet, he tried his best to tamp down the rising panic.

“Well, that was weird,” Laughing, Bill nudged Richie in an attempt to get a reaction. His face fell when he got nothing. “What’s wrong now, Richie?”

“Nothing!” Richie said quickly, voice cracking. “Nothing at all!”

In truth, everything was wrong. He’d always been damn sure he’d never hear the words on his wrist said out loud by any sane person, but now he’d come to realize that maybe his soulmate was simply a lunatic. Richie took a second to take a breath before standing back up and staring Bill dead in the eye. 

“What’d you say his name was?”

“Uh, Eddie?”

“I want to meet him.”

“Y-yeah, I’ll introduce you t-two!” Bill’s face lit up at the thought of two of his friends meeting, and Richie’s face lit up at the thought of meeting his soulmate. “Wait, how come?”

“Y’know how we were just talking about our soulmarks?”

“Mhm?”

“Well, this is mine,” Taking off his bracelet, Richie showed Bill his wrist. 

“W-what the  _ fuck _ .”

“Yeah, how do you think  _ I _ feel?” Richie said, distressed. “I’ve had that on me since I was a kid!”

“No wonder you didn’t w-want to show me,” Laughing, Bill sighed and threw Richie a grin. “I’ll definitely introduce you two. Let’s j-just wait for a day where h-his stomach isn’t...uh...acting up?”

“Sounds like a plan, Big Bill!”

Hopping on his bike, Richie smiled and tossed his bracelet in the woods. He didn’t need to cover his soulmark anymore. Bill squawked, running after it. 

“Don’t l-litter!” Throwing Richie the damp bracelet, Bill huffed when Richie rolled his eyes at him. “It’s b-bad for the environment, Richie!”

“Fine, fine,” Instead of throwing it, Richie stuffed it deep in his pocket and put up his bike’s kickstand. “Let’s go to the arcade!”

“Race you there,” With that, Bill was off. “Hi-yo Silver, away!”

Richie snorted at his dorky friend and started after him. His wrist was left uncovered, a pale white band starkly contrasting with the tanned skin around it. That’s what he got for wearing a bracelet. The words on his skin were clear as day, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. He was going to meet his soulmate soon. Nothing could put a damper on his day now. Richie wore his soulmark loud and proud.

_ MOVE! I’M GOING TO SHIT MYSELF! _

He couldn’t  _ wait _ to meet his soulmate. 

  
  


__________

Eddie knew that he was dramatic. Unfortunately, he knew that a big reason why was his mother. He’d learned years ago that all of his medications were fakes, that everything his mother had ever told him was a lie, but none of that had stopped him from his perpetual paranoia that everything around him could hurt him in some way or another.

Now, he didn’t exactly need to go through his mental vault of medical knowledge to know that he’d gotten food poisoning a few days ago. It had been terrible, and he still wasn’t sure exactly what had brutally attacked his stomach, but he greatly resented it. 

The worst part of it hadn’t been sitting on the toilet while dry heaving into a wastebasket, no, that absolutely wasn’t it. For him, it had been the fact that he’d passed his soulmate somewhere along the way home. His words were simple, a very blunt  _ ‘what the fuck?’  _ tattooed on his thigh. They were  _ too _ simple, and it left him wondering how the fuck he’d ever know who his soulmate was. 

Well, he’d figured it out.

He barely remembered any of his ride home the other day, but he did vaguely remember feeling his soulmark tingle when he went flying past someone who said those very words. It would have been a much bigger deal to him at the time if not for the fact that his bowels were very unhappy with him. Needless to say, Eddie had never expected that. He’d just assumed that he was doomed to never know who his soulmate was.

So that left him sitting in his room, wondering what to do next. He’d technically already met his soulmate, now he just had to find them, right? Right?

Wrong.

How the hell was he supposed to figure out who they were when he’d passed half the town on his way back home? It could have been anyone, regardless of gender, race, or age. Well, they had to be somewhere in his age range, but aside from that, Eddie had no clue in hell who his soulmate could be. Plus, school was out for the summer, so it wasn’t like he could just go to school and look for them. Not to mention that he had no idea what their words would be, as he had been a bit preoccupied on his ride home.

Groaning, Eddie flopped down onto the bed and tried to smother himself with a pillow, a sad attempt to put himself out of his misery. It didn’t work, and he angrily threw it aside. His phone lit up, the screen telling him that Stan was calling him. Taking a few moments to pull himself together, he answered and put on the most cheerful voice he had. 

“Hey Stan, what’s up?”

“Not much. I was wondering if you wanted to go out to the Barrens with me, I’m bored as hell and I have a feeling that you’re not doing anything.”

“I don’t know, it’s really hot out.”

“We can go swim in the quarry later if it gets too bad.”

Gnawing on his lip, Eddie huffed. “Fine. But you have to do me a favor.”

“Uh-oh. What now?”

“I think I met my soulmate, but I had food poisoning and was riding my bike home at like, full speed ahead, right? So I felt my soulmark tingle but I don’t know what they said or what they even look like, so I don’t know what to do.”

“Um,” Stan paused, probably processing the word vomit Eddie had just spewed. “We can look for them together.”

“Really?” Eddie asked, trying to tamp down the excitement swelling in his chest. “Thanks Stan, that means a lot.”

“Only if you go birdwatching with me later this week without complaining about it.”

“Done.”

“Sounds good to me. I’ll be over in a little bit, we can start at your house and go from there.”

Thirty minutes later found Eddie no closer to finding his soulmate. It wasn’t a long amount of time, but for someone as impatient as he was, it felt like an eternity. Hell, they’d made it all the way out to the Barrens with no luck at all. 

“This is taking fucking  _ forever _ .” 

“You do realize that we just started, right?” 

“Yeah, but still!” Stan rolled his eyes, and Eddie took a moment to look at him, really look at him. He was new to Derry, having moved here just a few weeks ago. Eddie was aware that there was some other new kid that had come along with him, but he hadn’t really met that guy yet. Stan barely knew him, yet here he was, helping him look for his soulmate without even thinking twice about it. With a smile, Eddie sighed. “Hey, thanks for helping me.”

“No problem. I know this is important to you,” Throwing him a small smile, Stan gestured at the street. “Come on, we can keep looking. Let’s loop back around to town.”

“Actually, I was thinking we could ask Bill to come help us?” It was more of a question than a statement, as Eddie wanted to make sure Stan was comfortable with another person coming along. “You’re gonna like him, I swear.”

“The more the merrier,” Putting down the kickstand on his bike, he got off and sat down on the nearest rock. “Hey, there’s a robin!”

“It’s pretty,” Eddie said, pulling out his phone and dialing Bill’s number. He answered almost instantly, surprising the hell out of him. Usually it took Bill centuries to answer. “Hey, what’s up?”

“I w-was just about to c-c-call you!”

Weird. Bill never called him unless it was an emergency. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just wanted t-to see if you wanted to go to the arcade w-w-with me and Richie!” Bill said, too much excitement in his voice. “How come?”

“You just don’t usually call me,” Pursing his lips, Eddie sucked in a deep breath. “Bill, I think I found my soulmate.”

“R-really?” He said, sounding ridiculously unsurprised. “That’s so cool, who is it?”

“Actually...I don’t know,” Eddie said miserably, frowning. “I was calling to ask if you wanted to come help me and Stan look for them.”

“I’ll be right over. H-hey, can I bring Richie?”

“Who?”

“The n-new kid.”

“Oh, sure!”

Telling Bill where they were, Eddie hung up and sat on the rock nearest to Stan. He looked content, staring up at the trees and the bushes, trying to spot the birds flitting from branch to branch. Eddie’s heart warmed at the expression on his face, happy that they’d become friends as quickly as they had. “Apparently he’s bringing Richie.”

“Really?” Stan sounded excited, almost as excited as he was about the birds. “I haven’t seen him in a while.”

“You know him?”

“Yeah, we’ve been friends for years. Our families both moved out here at around the same time, so we’re lucky we didn’t get split up in the move.”

“Huh. I didn’t know that.”

“How do you know Bill?” Stan asked. 

“About the same way that you know Richie. He’s been my best friend since I was a kid, but we’ve never actually moved anywhere,” He mused, resting his chin on his hand. “I hope we never do, I don’t know what I’d do without him.”

“Do you think he’s your soulmate?”

“Nah. I would have known by now,” Looking over at Stan, he furrowed his brow. “What does  _ your _ soulmark say?”

Stan opened his mouth to respond, only to be rudely interrupted.

_ “Hi-yo Silver, away!” _

_ “Dude shut the fuck up we get it your bike is fast!” _

The telltale sound of Bill’s battle cry rang through the trees, allowing them to hear him before they saw him. Stan froze in place, staring at the empty space in front of him before Bill came out and stopped his bike right in front of him, just as he always did. The source of the second voice came flying through a bush right next to Bill, crashing into Eddie’s rock and sending both him and Eddie tumbling back into the leaves. 

“What the hell, dude?” Eddie snapped, standing up and dusting himself off. Glaring down at the guy, he resisted the urge to kick him while he was down. “Does your bike not have brakes or some shit?”

The kid, probably Richie, was staring up at him in wonder. His glasses made his already wide eyes look almost comically large, like looking through a fishbowl.

“What the fuck,” Richie whispered.

Eddie’s glare immediately turned to one of shock and confusion, his soulmark tingling as it had a few days ago. “Are you fucking serious? You’re my soulmate?”

“Yep,” Richie breathed, a goofy smile creeping onto his face. “That’s me.”

“Wait, what the fuck is your soulmark?”

“Oh boy, you don’t want to know,” Eddie’s eyes immediately went to the bracelet on Richie’s wrist. Somehow, he was sure that the mark was under there. So he did what any logical human being would do in this situation. He tackled Richie like the feral gremlin he was and snatched it off of his wrist. “Let me  _ see!” _

“Dude, fuck! Fine!” Holding out his wrist, he showed Eddie the mark. Immediately, Eddie felt his heart sink to his toes. “Happy?”

“Oh my god. You have to be fucking kidding, that  _ cannot _ be the first thing you heard me say.”

“It totally is, it was so fucking funny.”

“I hate this and I hate you.”

“Aw Eds, don’t be like that,” Richie drawled, picking himself up off the floor with a groan. “You’ll learn to  _ love _ me.”

“I very highly doubt that,” Annoyed, he spun on his heel and stomped towards Bill. "And my name isn't Eds. It's Eddie."

“See that? That’s a Cedar Waxwing,” Stan said softly, staring at a bird perched on the top branch of the nearest bush. Looking over his shoulder at Bill, he smiled and patted the spot next to him on the rock he sat on. “Nice to meet you, I’m Stan.”

“I-I-I’m Bill,” He managed to stutter out, glancing at his forearm before looking back up at Stan in awe. “Y-y-you’re m-my…”

“Yeah,” Scooting over a bit more, Stan waited eagerly for Bill to sit. “Wanna watch some birds with me?”

Nodding so hard that Eddie was sure he’d break his neck, Bill walked over and plopped down next to Stan, their bodies pressed up against each other. Stan immediately started pointing out each bird and telling Bill everything about them, excitement radiating off of them both. 

Sitting on a nearby log, Eddie gestured at Richie to sit next to him as well. “Might as well watch the birds with them, right?”

Dumbfounded, Richie slowly walked over to Eddie and sat down next to him cautiously, as if Eddie would bite him. As the minutes passed, he scooted over closer and closer until they were pressed up against each other like Stan and Bill. Slowly, Eddie rested his head on Richie’s shoulder and sighed happily. 

“Your shoulder is bony as fuck.”

“Sorry, I’ll just go shave it down a little bit for you.”

“I don’t mind it,” Shifting in his spot, Eddie took a deep breath and smiled. “So, you’re my soulmate?”

“Looks like it,” Richie’s hand reached up to rest on Eddie’s head, fingers carding through his hair. “So, where the hell were you going so quickly the other day?”

“Food poisoning. Not fun.”

“Well, at least it meant that I found you.”

“Good point. Now shut up and watch the birds, there’s a really pretty one up there and I wanna see it,” Craning his neck to look at Stan and Bill, he grinned. They were looking awful cozy, their fingers laced together and heads resting against each other. Bill deserved this, Eddie thought. He’d always been a romantic, and watching the birds with the splashes of pink and orange sunset shining through the trees next to his soulmate was probably a dream come true for him. “Hey, Stan? What’s the name of the one with the yellow chest?”

“Oh, that? That one’s my favorite!”

The four of them sat and listened to Stan talk, basking in the last bits of sunlight gracing the Barrens together. Their day had been a good one. They would go home and sleep soundly, but for now, they sat and enjoyed everything about each other. 

**Author's Note:**

> I love these chaotic idiots
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed it! Please comment feedback, it helps keep me motivated and helps me know what you guys do and don't like!
> 
> Follow me on instagram at archangelica_angelica or on tumblr at eddiesdeaddie if you want to get in touch or just to watch me shitpost!


End file.
